Parenting Anonymous

All of us have bad parenting days. At least I hope so. Even the most patient and most loving of us would have at some point of time felt that they were battling an insurmountable battle where tears and angry words battle a fierce battle with loving smiles and tender patience.

The world of parenting is like a pendulum. There are days when the pendulum swings your way, your child is happy and smiling and you feel so happy and proud as a parent. And then there are days when the pendulum swings the other way, when nothing seems to go right, when tears and pouts greet you when you expect them the least, when you want to be patient and loving but at times end up being anything but that.

Consider this ‘situation’.

It is 10 p.m. in the night and you are trying to clear up the dinner plates and catch a few hours of sleep before an early day at office tomorrow.

Your 6 year old daughter is on the verge of some path breaking new innovation, so she says, of discovering a new television (made with pieces of cardboard and plastic) that would let her and her friends watch Chota Bheem all day. After all she has been told watching too much television all day and specially Chota Bheem is bad for her eyes and brain and is trying to find her own solution to the problem.

And of course, busy innovator that she is, she does not have time for such mundane things such as finishing her dinner.

So what do you do?

a)     Let her innovate, anyway India needs less people who copy and more who innovate, food can wait for another day. Maybe you have a scientist in the making?

b)     Run behind her with the food, she just can’t miss her dinner; you can feed her while she continues innovating?

c)     Scold, shout, cajole, threaten to beat, actually beat, and use all persuasion tactics at your disposal to make her first finish her dinner. She can’t miss her dinner.. innovation be damned

d)    What if you want to go with option (c) and your spouse with option (a). What do you do then, do you start another fight, this time with your spouse on the importance of discipline in the child’s life?

Whichever option you choose, you are bound to feel few moments of anxiety and doubt. Am I doing the right thing? Will this help my child? Am I a bad parent?

Enter Parenting Anonymous.

What if there was a club, you know something on the lines of Alcoholics Anonymous, where you could discuss such scenarios with fellow parents who have gone through similar situations, who don’t judge you but just listen.

What if you could nurse a cup of tea, nothing alcoholic mind you, just a good old cup of tea and just talk about these  ‘situations’ that you have with your kid? And what if other parents share similar stories and you feel that you are not alone, you are not a bad parent, it’s a just bad day and you can learn something new about yourself and about parenting today.

Parenting, the toughest job in the world for which there is no school and no real training. Don’t we at least deserve our own club? We don’t need pity or advice or judgment or sneers or adulation, at times all we need is just to be heard and to hear.

So here’s to the idea of Parenting Anonymous. Till some wise soul starts it, maybe fellow bloggers can share their parenting nightmares and we can all sip an imaginary cup of tea and listen and learn!