A cup of wine and a girlfriend of mine

Try entering the latest new restaurant in town this weekend. Chances are you will see at least one group of well-groomed ladies, (could be any age-group), exuding warmth, confidence, exuberance and camaraderie, holding glasses of mocktail or wine with practiced ease while catching up with other women friends. Is this a new trend in the making, one that concepts such as Women on Wanderlust (called WOW in short, where women travel with a group of other women to exotic destinations) or Ladies nights at pubs across Indian cities are trying to cash in on?

Growing up, I have to admit I did not have a lot of friends who were girls.

While some were busy being Queen Bee, others were equally busy being the followers. Few were lost in the world of would be boyfriends and some were lost in preparation for their would be careers. There were power games and ever changing rivalries with cold shoulder tactics and gossip used at strategic junctures to cut people down to size.

I found very few girls I could connect to – girls who wanted to just learn, read, sing, laugh and not try to be a damsel in distress waiting for her knight in shining armor. And the ones who dared to be different, were often labelled as misfits or worse in the world of budding feminine graces and wiles.

I could count literally count 4 or 5 such girls through school and college who became really close friends and still remain so despite being oceans and continents apart.

But, in my 30s now, happily married, with a husband, kid and a job, I suddenly find myself surrounded by more and more such really inspiring women friends.

Strong, independent women who have their own careers and lives and who fight their own battles from potty cleaning to boardroom meetings.

Women, who manage the politics of office as easily as they rock the parties, soothen their nagging maids and tell stories to their children. Women who are not doormats, who are not sorry for themselves but who live and inspire other women and even men, each day. Women who are secure in their relationships and their roles without losing themselves in a mad rush to be the perfect wife/mother/daughter/employee and fulfill other age-old societal norms and expectations.

People say women are their own worst enemies. But working women, and even more specifically, working moms of today share a pretty special bond, I would say, one that can easily rival the ‘old boys club’. I wish them more power and more luck. Hopefully more and more women would join their ranks and the guilt and doubt that all of us go through as working mothers would be something we can accept and face more easily.

Yes, my salute to these women of today. They can very well face the world without marriage or men.

But still, many of us find happiness, companionship, respect and admiration in our spouses and also in our men friends.

So, for the men who are strong enough to be the partners and friends of todays' women, I am reminded of Sheryl Crowe’s song “Are you strong enough to be my man?”. Hats off to these men for not judging us and not being intimidated us but rather for always being there for us. My salute to all of you as well.. 

Hope our daughters and sons will continue this journey as they grow up and we have a society where women cease to be treated as objects but rather get the respect due to all individuals.